love, loss, change
by bookaholic1999
Summary: Natalie Jackson just moved to Forks with her cousin bella, she meets the gang and everything starts normal, until she discovers the vampires and werewolves, but what happens to her? How does she react? Who does she turn to? Can she ever have a happy ending ?
1. Chapter 1

Hi, I should probably introduce myself, I'm Natalie Jackson, I'm 17 and I'm on my way to a rainy place called Forks to see my cousin Bella Swan while my foster parents are on vacation in India, its kind of a work thing that's why I didn't go. Bella's not really my cousin, her grandparent's adopted my birth mother so my mum and her mum grew up together. Yeah I guess you're wondering why I didn't stay with Bella and her mum or something and went into care even though they offered, well the truth is I didn't want to, I wanted to start a new life after my parents died by being murdered by some men trying to rob the house when I was 8, and being with Bella and her mum would just have been a constant reminder of what I could have had with my parent's, but no, my parent's had to be "Heroic" as everyone say's a try to fight the robbers and get shot in the process, now in my eye's that's just plain stupid! I mean did they really think the robbers would come unarmed to steal, did they ever think of the consequence's, about leaving me! no they didn't and I hate them for it. My foster parents are nice though, I have been with them for 6 year's now and they do the best they can for me, even if that mean's leaving me every now and then to help some poor people in a less economically developed country. But hey, I'm a big girl, I can look after myself.

Well anyway, I'm sat in the back of "uncle" Charlie's police car on my way to his house where I'm going to be staying for 6 month's which is the longest Sophie and Phil (my foster parent's) have left me for. I'm stareing out the tinted black window taking in the surroundings of my temporary home, it's really nice and peaceful looking, though what do you expect from a tiny town like Forks. There's greenery everywhere which is beautiful, nothing like the city (I make a mental note to go exploring the woods soon) and there's a few shop's in the area but none that say "Clayton's" where Bella work's, maybe I could drop in and surprise her.

"Hey, umm Nat?" Charlie say's looking through the rear view mirror flicking back from the road to my face.

"Yes Charlie?" I ask rather politely.

I'm not comfortable enough to speak to Charlie informally with my usual "yeahh" or "wassup"

"Bella is out with errr, Edward at the moment so umm I can help you unpack if you want" he said in a tone which you can tell he isn't comfortable either.

I think Charlie is someone who just want's to keep himself busy with anything because I don't think he really cares about me unpacking, but I'm gunna be with him for 6 month's so I might aswell get to know him a bit.

"Yes that would be great, thankyou Charlie" I said while smiling in the rear view mirror, he smiled back then returned his eye's to the road.


	2. Chapter 2

After I finish unpacking with Charlie's help in the spare room it's seven o'clock in the evening, I lie down on the single bed with a multicoloured bed spread in the middle of the room proud of my organisation skills. I have my photo's in a red frame on the white wall by the wardrobe to the left which is now filled with my clothes, my martial art's trophie's and book's on my shelf near the T.V opposite the bed, and my alarm clock, lava lamp, make-up and jewellery all in place on a tiny table next to the bed.

I got up lazily to change into my pyjamas, which is just a pair of short's and a big t-shirt that say's 'Never judge a book by it's movie' put my hair into a ponytail and decided to head downstairs for a cup of tea. Downstairs in the kitchen there was a note from Charlie,

"Sorry, got a call from the station, just order

pizza if your hungry, the menu is by the phone."

Wow is he really that uncomfortable around me that he had to leave a note? I grab the pizza menu and order a Hawaiian pizza with extra pineapple. I was just about to sit down when there was a knock at the door, I sighed and got up and answered it, staring in front of me was a man, probably about the same age as Charlie, with long black hair with a cowboy hat on in a wheelchair, holding the chair was a tall muscular boy with the same golden brown skin and long black hair as the man in the wheelchair, they were defiantly related.

"Hi, is Chalie home" asked the man politely in the wheelchair.

"Uh no sorry he not long left he got called in at the station" I replied feeling a bit like an intruder in Charlie's home.

"Oh that's a shame, he invited us round to watch the game and-" he got cut off mid sentence by Charlie pulling up on the drive way.

I stood there by the door way as they all greeted eachother, I learned that Billy was the man in the wheelchair and the boy's name was Jacob, Charlie said that it was just a misunderstanding at the station and it was all sorted, as they walked inside I held the door open and Jacob smiled as he passed, Wow he was gorgeous, I blushed and suddenly felt a little shy wearing my pyjamas. Charlie made introduction's even though I already knew there name's and then headed upstairs totally forgetting about my tea wanting to avoid any boring topic's about my life.

Upstairs listening to music and reading I didn't notice Jacob standing in the doorway until he coughed awkwardly, I looked up, he was wearing a black t-shirt that clung to him showing off his muscles, ripped worn jeans and he had his long hair tied back out of his face, wow i didn't realise how beautiful he actually was.

"Hi yeah come in" i say snapping back into focus,

he smiled at me then came and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Thanks, did you order pizza?" well that's an odd way to start a conversation, oh crap! I totally forgot about the pizza

"Uhh yeah i forgot about that, why is it here" I ask now suddenly feeling hungry

"Yeah Charlie and Billy are digging in now, I thought you would wanna know before it goes, they eat like pigs haha" he says laughing easing the tension.

"haha yeah okay ill be down now" i say getting up putting down my book and turning off my music.

After the pizza satasfied my hunger, Jacob and I went to my room because Charlie and Billy were watching the game and gossiping like a pair of old ladies, which apparently they do allot. We actually got on rather well, we talked about the usual stuff, likes and dislikes and I said I would com down and visit him down at La Push and see the car he's been working on.

"So what's your story?" jacob asked looking curiously at me.

" I don't have much of a story, my parent's died when I was 8 and now I stay with my foster parent's Sophie and Phil, but there in India for work so i'm here" i said getting bored at how many times i have had to tell this story.

"Oh i'm so sorry" he said looking at me with a sympathy look i have seen a thousand times.

"No don't worry about it, what happened happened and I can't change it, I don't want your sympathy" I snap "sorry" I say kinder now "I didn't mean to snap"

"it's okay umm if you don't mind me asking, how come your here with Charlie, are you related or..."

He stopped and I told him about Bella's grandparent's adopting my mum and stuff, not really going into to much detail.

"oh" he said suddenly changing the atmosphere into a tense one.

Saving me from the awkwardness Billy shouted up to say to Jake it was time to leave,

"hey let me know when you wanna see the car" jake said holding the door open about to walk out of the room

"yeah okay sure" i replied

and then he left and i just sit and let the drouseyness take over and put me in a deep sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning I rushed downstairs realising I have to go to my new school with Bella. I still haven't seen yet because she was out with someone called Edward, and by the look on Charlie's face when he mentioned him in the car Edward either set's a bad example or is her boyfriend. OMG what if it's her boyfriend ! I really have to speak to her about that, making sure she's being safe and stuff. Hmm I wonder what he looks like, what if he is really hot like in the movies, awwwww it's about time Bella found someone I bet there so cute together. I get dressed in a pair of black jeans, black boots and army green 'linkin park' top with my leather jacket, put my hair in a high pony added a bit of mascara and lip gloss and headed downstairs wanted to see Bella. I get downstairs and find Bella eating breakfast, already dressed and starring at a clock, there's no Charlie so he is probably at the station already.

"Bella!" I shout and run and give her a fat hug before she could even get up from her chair.

"Oh hey nat it's so good to see you" she said gasping for air,

I let her go from my bear hug, make a cup of tea and sit down next to her. We chat for a few minutes about how things are going, family, friend's, but she didn't mention Edward, maybe he wasn't her boyfriend then. I was just about to ask her about him when she looked up at the clock on the kitchen wall, which was something she seemed to be doing alot throughout the conversation, she walked towards the door and opened it. Stood in the door way was a boy with pale skin that almost looked like marble, he had amazing amber coloured eyes and messy light brown hair. Bella hugs him and ushers him inside where he comes to the kitchen where I was sat, you can see there together just by the look in Bella's eyes, full of nothing but love and need.

"Hello, i'm not sure if Bella has mentioned me at all, i'm her boyfriend Edward Cullen" he said while shaking my hand, wow his hand's are really cold it must just be the outside.

"Hi, umm no she didn't actually, I have only seen her for about" I glance up at the clock "ten minutes because someone held her captive when I arrived" I say in a sarcatic voice, he just smiles and appologises.

Now I am all for Bella having a top boyfriend but there's something not quite right about him, i don't know what it is but i don't really want to find out either, he gives me the chills.

"Hey Bells do you know if my bike has been delivered?" wanting to know if my escape route has arrived so I don't have to be stuck with these two in a car, I got a funny feeling they were one soppy couple.

"Yeah it's around the back by the tree stump" she said with a smile on her face, clearly she's thinking the same thing as me.

"Awesome thank's bells" I shout dashing out the door.

I park up my motorbike in a free space in Forks high school with directions Charlie gave me and see Bella getting out of the orange truck with Edward walking towards me.

"Bells were am I going?"

"Your in my lessons all day except for History so just follow me" she says.

As I walk to my first lesson I keep getting alot of looks from boys, girls and even teachers and then they all turn around and whispered, I try to ignore them and just keep walking. My first lesson is biology but instead of being placed with Bella I was partnered with someone called Mike, he seems... nice, I guess, just a bit annoying and he keeps looking at my clothes.

"So how are you enjoying Forks?"

God cant he think of something interesting, i'm probably going to be asked that question a million times today.

"Yeah, it's fine" I reply with a bored tone, I hope he gets that I don't really care. Mike looks back and for at me and sits silent for the next ten minutes while i concentrate on my biology work, but then he stares at me and takes a deep breath,

"umm Natalie, do you umm want someone to show you around town this weekend, yano go shopping or see a movie, I can be like a tour guide"

Omg did he just ask me out or something, oh really come on, on my first day! aww but ill feel bad if I turn him down, even through I don't care but it would be nice to see a movie.

"Mike I don't need a tour guide but if you bring a few friends and ill bring a few friends we all go to the movies together?"

yeah that sounds reasonable so I turned him down but i a nice way right?, well I hope thats the impression I gave off. A small grin rose on his face

" Yeah sure this weekend ill ask the guys" and we went back to silence for the rest of the lesson.


	4. Chapter 4

**sorry I took so long to update my computer was messing up :( please review x**

Lunch time was after my History lesson so i was on my own, i made my way to the canteen by following the other students and grabbed a sandwich and sat on the far table by the window. I look around seeing if I can spot Bella but she's not here yet so I just tuck into my sandwich and hope nobody sits next to me so I can have a bit of peace and quiet while I wait for Bella, I stick my feet up on the chair next to me so people get the message and get half way through my sandwich, I notice four people, well mlre of two pairs walking towards me, all of them had the same marble skin, one boy was built like a bull with short brown hair and a cheeky smirk on his face, he was holding onto a girl with long flowing hair and peircing eyes. The other boy and girl next to them both had short spikey hair but they boys hair was allot lighter brown than the girl next to him, both of them grinning and the girl kind of skipping, she reminded me of a pixie.

They all stop infront of me, so I placed down my sandwich and looked up slowely,

"Hi your Natalie right? Bella's cousin?" the pixie girl asks

"yeaaah, and you are...?" I ask tilting my head to the side and not moving my feet from the chair next to me.

"I'm Alice, were Edward's family, this is Jasper" (the boy with her) "and this is Rosalie and Emmett" (the couple next to them)

"Nice to meet you" i say looking at them all but they all just look back at me curiously.

"Do you mind?" Alice asks

"umm no not at all" I reply, well so much for peace and quiet but I move my feet and look friendly anyway.

As they sit down I notice they all have the same amber eyes like Edward, is that even normal, like a family thing or did they just get contacts?

While thinking about the eyes of the Cullen family I didn't notice Bella and Edward walk in and sit down chatting to the others.

"Hey nat...naaaaat...Natalie?" I finally tune in and realise it's bella waving her hand in my face trying to get my attention.

"Oh hey yeah what?" I ask confused

"I was asking how was Biology? I didn't have time to ask you earlier before you went to History" she said

" Oh Biology, yeah it was good I guess, Oh and that reminds me Mike" I say pointing to the table was sitting on "asked me if I wanted to go and see a movie with him and his mates, wanna come?" I ask really hoping she says yes so I know somebody there and don't look like a complete outcast.

Bella looks between me and Edward "sorry nat, i can't I umm got plans" she says trying to look sympathetic, but clearly she doesn't want to go and she's looking at Edward for an escape route, even I can see that.

I slump back into my seat even lower "you mean Edward plans" I say mockingly and roll my eyes .

Edward now gets the message "yes actually im taking Bella out to dinner" and they link hands on the table, bella just smiles and looks at me

"fine whatever" I mumble really quietly but Edwards lips lift into a smirk.

I feel a bit dissapointed because I haven't seen Bella in years and all she does is spend time with Edward, but on the possitive side it sort of makes me feel like I have been here for weeks and she is fed up of me and has gone back to her normal life, it makes me feel less awkward and less new, if only it was like that with everyone else, well I guess it will happen soon enough.


	5. Chapter 5

Friday afternoon. My first week of school is finally over. It wasn't that bad I met some really nice people, Jessica, Angela, Mike is okay and Eric he's funny but I spend allot of my time with the Cullen's, Rosalie especially because we just get on really well, I don't know how because you would think that our hateful personalities would clash but it actually sort of works because we know if the other wants to be left alone or if they just need a good gossip about people they don't like.

Right now I'm doing a starfish over my bed thinking what to do, Bella has gone out with Edward as usual and I'm still going out with Mike and the others tomorrow so there is no point in me going out with them, hmm maybe I could go and see jacob, I did say I would drop in and see the car he's been working on. I get up off my bed and go downstairs to ask Charlie for jacobs number, instead he gives me Billy's house number and he answers almost straight away,

"Hi Billy, it's Natalie, is Jacob about?"

"Hi nat it's good to hear from you, yeah ill get him for you now"

I smile to myself hearing Billy shouting to jacob that I'm on the phone, theres a bit of shuffling then he answers

"Hey nat I was wondering when you would call, what's up?" he asks all cheery

"nothing I was just wondering if you were busy, Bella's out and I'm meeting everyone else tomorrow so I was wondering if you had time to show me that car?"

I swear he just smiled, is it even possible to know that?

"yeah sure come down and I'll wait up by the road, just to be sure you don't go to far"

"okay cool I'll be about twenty minutes"

"Awesome bye"

"bye" I say then put down the phone.

Charlie looks at me from the sofa "going out with jacob" he says not really asking a question.

"yep" I reply anyway with a smile then turn around grab my keys and i'm out the door shouting bye to Charlie.

On my bike I follow the road Charlie showed me a couple of days ago, I drive about 20 minutes and then I see jake standing by the road so I decide to show off and do a wheelie past him, spin on my back wheel and drive back to him with a smug look on my face, his jaw just dropped but then he smilled

"Wow you really got skills"

"I know" I say still looking smug,

jacob just nudges me, laughs and helps me with my bike taking it to the garage.

we get into the garage and there is tools and bikes and spare parts everywhere but in the middle is a big car -I think- under a massive sheet.

"so you ready to see the rabbit" jake says rubbing his hands together,

what on earth did he mean by the rabbit? i thought i was coming to see the car, I think jacob noticed the confusion on my face because he just laughed and grabbed the sheet off the car, oh so he was on about the car. The car actually looks really good, its a bit rusty and some parts are still missing from the inside like the clutch but apart from that it looks good, I can believe he actually did this himself he must be better than I thought.

"the make of the car is a rabbit" he says still laughing but then he goes all serious "do you like it"

"jake this is amazing, your really talented yano"

he smiles again "thanks" and then starts looking at me up and down,

"what?" I ask doing an inspection of my clothes

he just laughes at me, I suddenly think I should be dressed in a clown outfit to match the amount of times he has laughed at me in the last five minutes.

"im just suprised my how you dress"

my eyes go wide and I start doing another inspection even quicker and he just laughs again, which is starting to get on my nerves.

"no no theres nothing wrong with what you wearing" yeah he better correct himself the moron "im just thought of you as a plain 'I don't care what I wear so meh" kind of girl but you actually dress really stylish for forks, and I think your the only girl around here who dresses punkrock"

I ease up a bit now because I know thats true, I am the only person around here who will wear all black, all the other girls dress in pinks and frills and bows or plain boring colours and no patterns. I wasn't dressed that bad today though I just had my red vest top with black jeans, red and black checkered daps, leather jacket and red and black skull scarf, and then my eyeliner and hair up in a high pony.

"well I prefer to be like this than a pink barbie or a 'look I can blend in with the wall' girl, I like to stand out"

"yeah the look suits you" he says sitting on the car bonnet

"thanks" I say and join him,

We sit there chatting for about three hours maybe four and like the first time I met him we just flowed with conversation and got on really well, he even let me braid his hair while we talked because he noticed I couldn't stop looking at it, the only downsider is that I couldn't look at his beautiful face in the process.

"hey jake im going to the cinema tomorrow with Mike Newton and a few of his friends an I don't really want to be a complete outsider so will you come, yano bring some of your friends too?" please say yes, please say yes.

"yeah okay, im sure Quil and Embry will want to come, what time?"

"the movie starts at 2 so just meet us outside at quarter to two, and then we can go out for food and chill for a bit and jessica wants to go shopping and I want to go to Rebel Rebel."

he looks confused "whats Rebel Rebel?"

"ummm in simple terms, amazing emo shop"

"heey are you saying im simple?"

"nooooo" but i couldn't help it I burst into laughter and jacob joined in to.


	6. Chapter 6

"Omg who chose this movie?"

Jessica hadn't stopped moaning since she saw some guy get killed in the begining of the movie and she was starting to get on my nerves, I thought Conan the Barbarian was a brilliant film but she kept saying it was too violent and bloody and they were the two reasons why I chose it. If I knew she wouldn't shut up I woukd have backed down from our little dissagreement in movies and let us all watch the fault in our stars, the boys and Angela didn't really care what we watched and they wouldn't give there opinion because they were enjoying seeing me and Jessica argue, but I didn't want to be seen crying because I am a ugly cryer and I wasn't wearing my water proof eyeliner so I didn't back down and I have no choice to listen to her moaning.

"Jess, mine, now shut up" I whispered agressivly telling her I was now losing patience with her, she just huffed and slouched in her seat, I could hear Jacob chuckle next to me but I payed no attention to him and carried on watching Conan the Barbarian.

After the movie we were all waiting for Mike who was in the bathroom. I was chatting to Jacob's friends Quil and Embry, who I got along with pretty well

"I love the part where the daughter scratched off half the womans face" I laughed

"yeah that part was awesome" Quil and Embry both nodded in agreement,

"Well I cant believe after all that drama they didn't even end up together" Angela said with Eric nodding while Jess was still huffing and puffing in the corner.

As we all chatted away (except Jess) I noticed we had been waiting for Mike for a while so I held up Jacobs wrist to check the time, we had been waiting for half and hour.

"Guys where's Mike he's taking forever" everyone stopped then looked confused,

"yeah he's taking ages" said Embry "ill go check on him"

"okay cool"

Two minutes later Embry walked out of the bathroom hunched over wiping the tears from his eyes in uncontrolable laughter

"whats so funny Em?" Jake asked chuckling

"he-he-h-he" and he burst into laughter again

"spit it out Em" said Quil

"he has been in there vomiting the whole time, he said it was all the blood in the movie" he wiped the tears from his eyes "what a pansy"

There was mixed reactions from what Embry said, Jess, Angela and Eric were all asking "is he okay?" "can we help?" and a "I knew we shouldn't have watched this movie" from moody Jess, they all looked worried, while me and the boys all looked at eachother and started uncontrolably laughing like Embry and the evil looks from Jess only made us laugh harder

"This isn't funny!" Jess shouted sending me daggers

"no your right its not" I stopped laughing and tried to look sympathetic, but i couldn't help it "its hysterical!" and I was laughing again which made Jacob fall on the floor laughing more than I thought was possible.

Thats when Jess got really mad "Right thats it im going to kick your ass!" she screamed, luckly there was nobody else around, I hate a crowd. Angela and Eric looked shocked and stood there frozen in place, I didn't dare move my eyes from Jess to see the boys expressions but the laughing stopped as I leaned up straight and stared down at her calmly

"oh really" I know she couldn't beat me in a fight but i don't she would be one to throw the first punch,

she hesitated for a split second then swung for my face, I guess I was wrong, thats when my martial arts training kicked in and I grabbed her fist just before it reached my face and held it slightly to the side in just enough time to see her try and give me a left hook but I blocked it with my free arm, then to quick for her to notice I let go of her fist and backhanded her as hard as I could across her face, my backhand started to sting a little but I could deal with it because it was totally worth it when I saw Jessica splattered across the floor. We all must of stood there for what seemed like hours but was actually about two minutes before Angela and Eric moved to help Jessica to her feet, when se was finally up I walked towards her only inches away from her frightened face and spoke

"next time you try to do that, I promise, I will not wait for you to get up off the floor before i put you in hospital with severe injuries, understand?"

her little frightened head just nodded ever so slightly, I smiled "good" and walked out.


	7. Chapter 7

I got halfway down the street when I could hear Jacob calling me, so I stopped and waited because I wasn't going to let that stupid fight bother me, I was still going to have my day out. When they caught up Jake picked me up and spun me 360° making me laugh, it seems everything this boy does makes me laugh, I think, I think, no theres no I think, I have fallen for him. It feels like I have known Jacob for years, he's always making me laugh and I feel like I can tell him anything and everything, my heart accelerates everytime he's near and I just have to look in his eyes to forget my worries, now I know this sounds like one of those really cheesy peoms but its true, and I am in love with Jacob Black.

"Wow nat you were amazing, how did you do that, I have never seen anyone so calm in a fight before" he had a look of amazement in his eyes.

"I learned to fight from a young age" I shrug "nearly every orphans does, if you dont you just cry while you get beaten" I smile to show him im okay.

Embry started getting really hypo, jumping up and down " you were awesome! you were all block, block, BAM! then shes on here back!" he started laughing doing boxing movements with Quil doing the same. I love how happy they are it make me happy, I jumped up to Embry and grabbed him on a headlock messing with his long hair, Jake and Quil were laughing but all the fun was cut short by a green faced Mike towards us. As he got closer he started appologising "Listen im really sorry abo-" instead of Mike coming straight up to me Jake put his hand on his chest and forced him to stop in his tracks. Jake then turned angry and spoke through his teeth

"listen she doesn't care, you go your way and we'll go ours"

Mike looked utterly shocked "I just came to-"

Jacob stopped him again "apologise?, why? because you like her?"

okay I love Jacob protecting me but this is starting to get awkward, i mean Mike didn't do anything, Jacob needs to calm down.

Mike just stuttered not knowing what to say but Jacob carried on "well guess what, she doesn't want to go out with you, who would want to go out with a pansy like you? Jess that's who, not Natalie, that's why Barbie got defencive at us laughing at you, not just us" he pointed to Embry, Quil and himself "but Natalie too, so go back and see Jess becaue you don't have a chance with her" he pointed at me.

Now it was my turn to be utterly shocked, what does he mean Mike doesn't have a chance, he's right Mike doesn't but is he trying to say he does? is Jake being so protective because he likes me?

Then Jacob goes to far and picks Mike up by his shirt and throws him to the ground

"Jacob stop" I say strongly, people start looking as there walking past, some even slowing down taking a good look.

"Yeah Jake come on" Embry says noticing too

"He's not worth it" added Quil

but he started walking towards Mike who was frozen on the floor watching the scene coming at him, Embry and Quil then stood infront of Jacob blocking Mike from his view but Jake was still trying to get to him, I even tried to turn Jacob around by ragging his arm because I was starting to feel sorry for Mike "Jacob STOP!" I screamed and fell to the floor with a stinging right cheek, I gasped and looked up, Jacobs backhand was still in the air, all four boys looked at me in shock then Mike ran off, well karma's a bitch.


	8. Chapter 8

I woke up the next morning aching from all the drama yesterday and got up lazily to walk to the bathroom, I was finishing brushing my teeth when I caught a look at the bruise forming on my cheek in the mirror and all the memories came flooding back, laughing at Mike, fighting with Jess, realising that I love Jacob, Jacobs hand in the air and the shocked faces of the four boys and finally Quil taking me to a taxi to take me home. I feel really bad for hitting Jessica, even though she started it, but I think the threat after was a bit unnessasary, but I didn't want her thinking she could fight me again so thats why I threatened her, I will have to call and apologise.

"Natalie?" dragged out of my thoughts I saw Bella looking at me worried, it was then I realised that I had been sitting on the bathroom floor with dried tears all over my face, I moved my hand from my cheek and she gasped,

"what happened to your cheek?"

"its nothing im fine" I wave my hand as a sign of dismissal and then rest my head on my knees and wrap my arms around my legs

"Nat what happened? you can home early yesterday then went straight to bed" then she sits down and puts her arms around my shoulders.

"Its nothing Bella really" I just want to be alone

"Explain the bruise then" well she caught me on that one

I took a deep breath and said "Jacob hit me" and then I riggled out of her grasp and went back to bed without another word.

The more I lied there, the more I thought about Jacob, I thought he was so nice, good looking, funny, but all that changed. My mind just kept going in circles, maybe I should forgive him because he was stressed and didnt know what he was doing, but why should I forgive someone who just turns angry at nothing and hits me when I try to help.

I dont know how long I laid there but I looked at my clock at it was 2 in the afternoon so I figured it was time to go downstairs and make some dinner. As I started buttering the bread for my sandwhich I started mumbling to myself like I always did when nobody else was around

"Why am I even shocked that he hit me, so what, I have been hit loads of times, I think im just really annoyed with him because I love him, but anyone can see that he likes Bella, god I cant believe im so stupid that I fell for someone who likes someone else, you only have to mention her name and his whole face lights up even more than usual, so why did he have to protect me when im not even his, hmmp, I think I should deal with it andlearn not to love him, yep good idea" and I shut up when I shove a ham sandwhich into my gob, just in time as Bella walked downstairs with Edward, I didnt even know he was here.

"hey guys" I say smiling

they both sit on the couch and mumble hey but then Bells turnes to me" hey nat are you okay"

"fine why"

"I umm spoke to Jess" she says quietly

"and?" I ask

"she said you both had a missunderstanding about Mike?"

"If her getting overprotective and trying to hit me so I put her on her back then sure we had a missunderstanding"

Bella looks shocked but Edward just smirks, but then Bella looks sad

"Nat I think-"

"yes yes I know i feel bad so im going to apologise later"

"okay" she gives me a small smile


	9. Chapter 9

I take off my helmet, get off my motorbike and head up the drive way to Jessica's house. Before I get a chance to knock on the door Jessica answers just peaking her head out the door,

"what do you want nat?" she sounds shaky then I see the bruise she has forming on her cheek, its looks bright purple and its swelled a bit, I must have hit her harder than I thought.

"I've come to apologise Jess, im really sorry about laughting in your face about Mike and im really really sorry for hitting and threatening you, I should have just walked away before everything got out of hand" then I pointed to my cheek "I guess karma thought I was wrong too"

She just looks at me for a while, then she grins and runs and hugs me tightly "Im sorry too".

We sit and chating her house for a while and im starting to like Jessica more, she may be a bit annoying sometimes when she babbles on about shopping and everything pink but shes really nice and really funny even if she does diss my clothes.

"so hows Mike" I asked

"He's okay he was just a bit shaken up about Jacob, but when I comforted him well..." she blushed

"your together arnt you" I say matter of factly, because I knew it was going to happen sooner or later

"YES!" she squilled and bounced up and down in her seat on the sofa.

Halfway through listening to Jess babble on about her new relationship with Mike like they were angels living in there own little private heaven, I got a call from Rosalie asking if I fancied coming over so I said bye to Jess and got on my bike to drive over. On the street to Bella's and my temporary home I saw someone knocking on the door, as I got closer I noticed who it was, it was Embry. I slowed down and parked on the drive, Embry didnt look his usual happy jokey self, and he was different, all his long locks dissapeared being replaces by short spikes and he looked older somehow, like he aged five years in one day, he walked over to me with a little smile.

"hey" he looks nervous

"heh Em, whats up?" he was making me feel awkward

"umm Jacob sent me-"

"Jacob sent you!" what he couldnt apologise himself oh tipical,

"hey, hey, listen he's ill-"

"He was fine yesterday" I make it sound as poisoness as possible adding an evil glare,

"its all very sudden, we dont know what it is yet, but he wanted me to appologise to you on his behalf, he said he is very very sorry and as soon as he gets better he's going to beg for forgiveness because he knows what he did was wrong, he just, well, lost it"

I took my helmet off so he could see my bruised cheek "yeah I noticed" I sighed "just tell him Im not mad and will forgive him as soon as he shows up and appologises himself"

"okay" then I put my helmet back on a drove off.

"HE DID WHAT!?" I knew I shouldn't have told Rosalie about Jacob, but i didnt think she would react this bad.

"Listen dont worry-"

"dont worry, he hit you" she snarled

"yeah but forgive him, I mean he was angry and-"

"omg" she sighed

"what" I asked clueless

"your in love with him"

I paused not knowing what to say, just when I opened my mouth to speak she beat me to it

"dont deny it natalie, i havent known you for long but its been long enough, if you didnt love him you wouldnt be forgiving him and making excuses on his behalf"

I looked down knowing ive been caught "Well it doesn't matter anyways because he loves Bella so drop it please" I stand up but sit back down immediatly feeling really dizzy.

"no I wont drop it, why dont you tell him?"

"because I dont want to?" I hope that was the right answer to make her happy,

I walked over to the kitchen avoiding the pain in my head and got myself a glass of water, I turned around and leaned against the counter feeling weak, it must just be my time of month or something, rosalie eyes me skeptically as I lift the glass to my lips, I realise my hands are shaking frantically.

"Nat are you okay?" she walks over to me gracefully then she stops "your not scared of Jacob are you, is that what it is?"

"Wait, what, no!" I shout

"then what is it"

"I, I actually dont know i just feel strange"

then Rosalie does a little gasp and sniffs the air, what the hell?

"come on come and lie down" she says soothingly

and thats the last thing I heard before darkness hits me.


	10. Chapter 10

I wake up with a little headache feeling confused, I feel around without opening my eyes, silk sheets? I dont have silk sheets. I open my eyes and take in my suroundings, im on a big double four poster bed, I sit up ingnoring my headache and look around, in front of me instead of a wall is a beautiful view of the woods, to my right there are tons on Cd's and old records amd to my left a little sofa. I guessed from the no wall infront that I was in the Cullens house, but why?

"ITS TRUE!" I jump out of my skin listening to what sounds like Rosalie shouting downstairs, I strained my ears to try and hear more "HER SCENT CHANGED!" well I didn't really need to strain my ears she was practically screaming, she sounded angry, but when they hell was she on about?

"Listen to yourself, nobodys scent CHANGES!" said a booming mans voice I didn't recognise.

"LISTEN I KNOW I SOUND CRAZY BUT WHY WOULD I LIE ABOUT SOMETHING THIS SERIOUS!" Rosalie wasn't really helping my headache with all her shouting but if I move they might hear me and stop talking.

"listen" said a soothing voice "maybe you just picked up a scent from a passing animal, did you recognise the scent at all, can you describe it?" this is just getting strange.

Then rosalie seemed to calm down much to my delight, I make a mental note to thank that soothing voice for calming her down later "It wasn't a passing animal, it was unique, it was kind of a mixture of human, forest and bird? and it was only for a few minutes, about 8 minutes after she passed out it faded back to plain human" what the hell? is she talking about me? owch my heachache is getting worse with all this confusion and thinking but I wanted to get to the bottem of this so I got out of bed and headed downstairs.

At the top of the stairs I was greeted by Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle and Esme I think her name was, all staring at me, Rosalie with wide eyes, Emmett with amused eyes and Carlisle and Esme looking concerned.

Esme spoke first " Hello Natalie, are you feeling better?"

"Just a little headache but apart from that im fine thankyou" I smile "how long was I out?"

Rosalie answers looking out the window in a trance "3 hours"

I shrug "oh thats not to bad" Emmett laughs at me and shakes his head in amusement.

I look out the window to see what Rosalie is looking at, im mesmerised by the forest, Its been so long since I walked amongst the trees, I feel my legs start to move against my will, like I have a magnetic pull towards the forest, but I dont care, I let my legs lead the way towards the door and out into the green maze of trees not even turning around to see the people behind me, all I can do is look forward.

I reach out, everything I walk past my hand brushes, tree trunks, leaves, flowers, branches, everything I can. I don't know how long I had been walking but I was to mesmerised by the green beauty around me to care, I found a tree trunk fallen to the ground by the wind acting like a bench so I decided to lie down back against the trunk, arms and legs spread just looking at the sun going down, It was really romantic, if only I had Jacob here with me then everything would be perfect, I sigh feeling relaxed but that didn't last long when I heard a twig snap. I sat up instantly wondering what it was when Emmett and Rosalie walked towards me hands up in surrender

"its only us" Emmett chuckles

Then I realise what I heard before I came here, I wanted to know what they were talking about, but I wanted to see all of there reactions before I said anything so as much as my body dissagreed I got up "lets go back" I said and started walking back to the house, it wasn't that hard to find my way back to the house, Rosalie and Emmett made a bet that I would get lost because apparently everyone did when they walked this far, and now they both owed me £20 each.

Back at the house Carlisle and Esme were sat down watching the T.v, as soon as I got in the house I shocked them all "okay so what was you all talking about my scent changing before I passed out" they were not expecting that.


	11. Chapter 11

Oh do they think im stupid or something, I know what I heard, im not delusional. So after I dropped the "I heard what you were saying" bombshell they all stood as still as stone, but now, there trying to lie there way out of it by saying I was ill and wasn't thinking straight! now I just feel like Rosalie when nobody would listen to her about my scent, even though im not 100% sure what she ment by that yet, but why couldn't they tell me, i mean whats the big secret, wow they have good sence of smell, so what.

"oh yeah who was the one to shut up Rosalie before I got up" I asked in the middle of there 'Natalie your delusional' speech, but Carlisle is clever and stuck to his story,

"Natalie Rosalie wasn't shouting, we were all watching T.v, making sure we were quiet so we didn't wake you up" he said calmly.

I just huffed, slouched against the sofa and run my fingers through my hair in fustration "your clever Carlisle ill give you that, but I know im right, and Emmetts smirking tells me im right also" then Carlisle looks at Emmett and his face goes slack

"Emmett keeps smirking when you seem to think of excuses, and he shakes his head slightly too, but he smirks allot more when I refuse to listen, as if he's impressed" now it was my time to smirk.

"I think you should go home Natalie get some rest" then Carlisle gets up as if ushering me out "we dont want you go blackout again" the others just stayed silent and looked away.

"okay fine ill drop it if it bothers you this much, but one day ill want an explenation"

"and one day you will" Rosalie replies a bit angry, I wonder what she ment by that, well whatever I dont care. I turn to leave when Alice barges in with Jasper shouting like a mainiac,well she sounds more like a child shouting at someone for steeling her doll "Rosalie how could you! and you Emmett for agreeing! how many people do you want to know!" okay now im really confused, what the hell was she talking about?, how may people knowing what?

"Well what does it matter, Bella knows!" Rosalie shouted, well I can just ask Bella then if they don't tell me, unless Rosalie wins this agruement.

"it doesn't matter you cant go around telling everyone" oh they weren't giving anything away were they,

"OH FOR GOD SAKE JUST TELL ME!" I exploded.

They all just looked at me like they forgot I was here and then fifty things happened at once. All of the windows smashed and Emmett was out of his seat and moved Rosalie out of the way so fast I couldn't even see him, Glass cut my arm and blood was oozing out because I was trying to keep up with Emmett I forgot to move myself, Jasper tried to attack me and he had fangs? but Carlisle and Alice restrained him and before I even had time to process what happened I blacked out again.

Rosalie's POV

"GET JASPER OUT OF HERE!" oh god what a mess, were definatly gunna have to tell Natalie now. I watch Alice and Carlisle drag Jasper out but when I turn around Natalie is on the floor unconsious again, she might have fainted, I move her brown locks from her face when I realise she isn't breathing, I try to feel for a pulse and nothing. Esme comes over and carries her to the little hospital we had set up just incase something happened to Bella, I wonder how those windows smashed?

Im upstairs in half a second and see that Jasper is calm with his head resting in Alice's lap, he leans up when he sees me

"I need to apologise to Natalie, I cant believe I snapped again" he looked so dissapointed, well serves him right he should learn to control his thirst

"thats what I came to talk about" then I turned to Carlisle standing in the corner "she either fainted or blacked out again but she isn't breathing, esme has taken her to your hospital room" and then he was gone.

Now it was Alice's turn "and you, stop looking at my future, so what if I was going to tell her, you didn't moan when Bella found out, maybe you should look at her future and see how she'll react when I tell her" I spat

she just looked down sad "I can't" she whispered, so quiet that if I wasn't a vampire I wouldn't be able to hear her.

"what do you mean you can't?" I asked

"I can't read her future, I dont understand why, but I cant" Natalie is just getting stranger and stranger by the minute, first her scent changed, now Alice cant see her future, ill have to see if Jaspers and Edwards gifts work too.

"Rosalie she cant be human, before she blacked out her scent changed, thats never happened before and I cant see her future, she cant be a werewolf she doesnt have anger outbursts or smell like dog, and she isnt one of us, so what is she?" Yes I knew I wasn't imagining her scent changing, but what could she be?

"I smelt her scent too when she blacked out the first time, I thought I smelled forest and Bird"

"wait shes blackout before?" she looks worried

"yes come on I thought you were suppose to know things, she blackout earlier today for three hours"

"shes either ill, or whatever she is, its building inside her" well this is more interesting, ill have to keep an eye on here, these kind of friends are allot more fun than human friends, but she better not be all day changing into whatever she is because im not a pacient person.

We went downstairs to discuss the windows smashing and come the conclusion that we have no idea what happened, we also checked on our mystery girl and all agreed to tell her what we are but not about her changing, Carlisle thinks its best if she figures things out for herself. We called Edward and Bella to come over so Bella could break the news to Natalie when she wakes up. We waited five boring hours until we heard stiring in the room so I asked Jasper to try and keep her calm with his gift while I went in to see her with Bella, this is going to be fun.


	12. Chapter 12

I woke up in the Cullens little hospital room, I had a bleeper next to me matching the rhythm of my heartbeat and I also had an oxygen mask over my mouth. I get up and take the mask off while the door opens and Bella walks in with Rosalie, I just put my hand up and shaked my head because I really don't fancy listening to there weird crap right now.

"No your hearing this weither you want to or not" god Rosalie is so stubborn

"no no I changed my mind, I don't care and I don't want to know" I lied, but it was true at this moment in time, but later I will really want to know.

"Liar" said Bella, great so now she was going to be a pain too.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair "oh fine tell me, but keep it short for now, ill ask questions later when I can be bothered" then Bella came and sat down in the chair next to the bed,

"now I know this is going to sound silly and strange-"

"get on with it Bells" I sighed

"The Cullens are, well, vampires"

yes she was right it did sound silly and strange, and they were the ones that called me delusional, "yeah and im a werewolf" I laughed but Rosalie just snarled

"think about what you saw before you blacked out again and what you thought you heard" Rosalie clenched her fists "think hard, it makes sence"

I gasped, it does make sence, she was talking about my scent and about human scents, Emmett moved so fast my eyes couldn't keep up, Jasper attacted me when I cut my arm and I saw his fangs but I didn't believe it. I started hyperventalating and feeling sick, I got up and ran outside seeking comfort from the forest with gladly no one following me. I sat down on the ground for a while and started to control my breathing, I decided to go and speak to Carlisle and get the whole story because I know I will be safe with him because he's a doctor at school so he must deal with blood all the time. After a while I asked myself one important question, are tthey dangerous? No, there not the Cullens are nice people, Rosalie is a good friend and Bella obvously likes them too otherwise Bella wouldn't be in love with one. I decided I was being silly so I got up slowely and went back to the house.

I walk into the Cullens house and everyone is there looking at me waiting for my reaction. I walk up to Carlisle slowely and take a deep breath "okay, im okay with it, you haven't hurt Bella and I know your all my friends so I guess im not going to be running away screaming like in the movies" I chuckle

"and thats why I would have agreed with Rosalie" Emmett said to Alice

"Alice how did you know Rosalie wanted to tell me?" I asked

"I have the gift to see the future, Edward can read your thoughts, and Jasper can control your emotions" this is just weirder and weirder, does that mean Alice can tell me what happens at the end of movies before they even come out? wow does that mean Jasper can make me feel better when im on my monthly? can Edward read all my previous thoughts, does he know I love jacob? Crap he's probably listening right now, god im so stupid.

I look at Edward and he's laughing "yes she can, yes he can and yes I am" I just groan and blush like an idiot thinking about Jacob while everyone else looks at me in confusion.

I must have sat there for hours asking questions until about 11 and even then I was wishing for more hours in the day so I could ask more questions but I was tired so I headed off home with Bella, sworn to secrecy about my friends and couldn't wait to find out more, I went to sleep dreaming of vampires.


	13. Chapter 13

The next few weeks went past and it was great, sort of. I spent most of my time either with Rosalie, who seemed to be keeping an eye on me, probably to help if I blackout, which I have been doing allot and for longer everytime, or in the forest for hours on end, either doing homework, reading or just seeking comfort. I got used to the Cullens now and understood almost everything there is to know about vampires, It was so hard to speak to my foster parents and not tell them about the Cullens, especially when we were talking everyday on the phone, but the more it became normal to me the easier it downer was that Jacob hadn't contacted me or even answered my calls, so I decided enough was enough. I got on my motorbike and headed over to La Push to see him face to face.

I rode to the top of the hill overlooking his house, I took off my helmet and saw the orange truck, what was Bella doing here? I thought he hasn't spoke to her either? Just as I got off my bike to walk down and find out what was going on, Bella come out of the house and walked towards four topless figures emerging from the forest by Jacobs house, as they got closer I only knew Embry and Quil, the other two I didn't recognise.

Then Bella shouts "WHAT DID YOU DO?" she seems angry maybe I should go down there and help if it gets out of hand, as they stand face to face Bella stops shouting but I can still see she's angry by her pointing and stiff standing, Wow she just slapped one of the boys, I was not expecting that, Bella never hits people what have they done thats that bad? The boy starts shaking unconrollably like he's having a fit and then turns into a...Oh crap, really a werewolf! well you can't have one without the other right. Oh no Bella down there! I start running down the hill but stop almkst immediatly when I see Jacob shouting Bellas name and running towards her turning into a giant werewolf just like the other boy, only the boys fur was grey and Jacobs was a light Chocolate brown. Then Jacob attacks the other wolf protecting Bella, great im so thrilled, NOT! why cant he see shes not interested, well not in that way, anyone can see she cares for him as a friend but shes not going to let go of her prince charming for him, I hope not anyway.

I snap out of my Jelousy and run and see Bella,

"Bella! Bella are you okay?" I panted

she didn't answer me, she just looked at the forest to where the wolves ran of fighting.

"Hey Nat haven't seen you in a while"

"Shut up Quil, what do we do with Bella"

Then the one I didn't know spoke with his deep voice

"Take her to Emily's" I just looked at him and raised my eyebrow "Im sam" he sad holding out his hand

"Natalie" I said and shook it "Ill take her to the truck, you drive, ill folllow on my bike"

"Ill carry her" I looked at his muscles and knew he could manage, so I just nodded, ran to my bike and followed them to Emily's.

We arrived at a little house and everyone was muching on muffins, Bella looked like her usual self again and I just walked in awkwardly to be greeted by who I guessed was Emily, She had three massive scares from the corner of her left eye all the way down to her mouth, giving her a perminant scowl. I greeted everyone then stood there awkward in the corner when Emily started snogging Sam, you could practically feel the love raidiating off there bodies, it was cute but did they really have to do it infront of me.

As I was debating weither to leave to stay a bit longer I heard laughing from outside, I peeked out the door and saw Jacob messing with the other boy wolf, it amazes me how they fight then become the best of friends five minutes later, although that was like me and Jessica. As Jacob walks in he goes to Bella first as I knew he would and didn't even notice me by the door so I coughed purposely to get his attention but instead I got everyones attention, the room went silent and Jacob just stood there looking at me not saying anything making me feel really awkward

"Well..." I said waiting for an appology and he still just stood there, in shock I think.

I waited for what seemed like hours but was probably seconds but no appology came oh just huffed "oh well nice to see you Jake" I said sarcastically and walked out.

I got to my bike and he finally come running out but it was too late, I clearly ment nothing to him, I wasn't even worth an appology so I didn't bother to look at him as I drove off.


	14. Chapter 14

I got back to the house with tears threatening to spill over my eyes thanks to Jacob, as I opened the door and walked in I was greeted by Charlie with a letter in his hand, he looks sad and hands me the letter. I stood there frozen because I have seen this letter before, I was eight at the time, it even had the same confidentiality stamp on the front so I didn't even have to open it to know what it was. It was all to much for me, I just stood there and burst into tears and started screaming in pain, It felt like my heart was being ripped out of my chest, I couldn't believe it was happening again, why me? why did my parents have to die for a second time, they were good people they didn't deserve to die, I couldn't believe it, I only spoke to them two days ago and now there dead.

"Oh Natalie" Charlie sighed and came and hugged me, I didn't really want to be hugged right now but I was in to much pain to move, I just cried into his chest wetting his t-shirt.

I got up off Charlie and appologised not looking at him, took my letter and went upstairs to greive on my own. I was still crying as I opened the letter so it was hard to read but It said that on the 17th of April at 10:39 am, Sophie and Phillip Jackson were in a car crash and die in hospital two hours later, I dropped the letter and layed there crying, screaming, another piece of me dieing inside.

The whole of the next day I just sat there, I didn't eat, I didn't move, I didn't talk. All I did Was think about my life, and considering weither death would be better, if death would be less painfull and more satisfying. Maybe there is an afterlife, maybe there is a heaven and hell, would I see my parents again? or be wondering around in complete darkness for being selfish and taking my own life? but what else is there to live for, all my family was dead, sure there was Bella and Charlie, but do I want to care for them so much that something would happen the them in result to them dieing, was everyone I loved a grenade, and I just kept putting the ring? I dont know, I just dont have the answers.

Day two of my parents death I had a visitor, Rosalie

"Natalie?"

"Yes" I whispered

she came and sat on the bed next to me "I know its hard" she said "but you have got to keep moving forward, you have to find the will to keep going"

I sighed "what if I cant"

she turned me to face her "you have to force youself too. Do you think it was easy for me being immortal and watchin everyone I loved die, no, but you learn to live with it, now you have to"

I wipped my eyes with the back of my hand "your right, I shouldn't be like this empty shell, I should remember all the good times I had with them and keep moving, because if I dont everything will just fall apart" I stood up "so im going to do exactly what I said to them I was going to do on that last phonecall three days ago"

"and whats that?" she asked

"hit the club" I smiled

"theres my girl" she chirped "Ill be waiting downstairs" then she left.

I turned on my stereo and blasted Paloma faith's 'Changing' and went to my wardrobe, I pulled out my bright blue jumpsuit and heels, them put on some foundation, mascara, eyeliner and red lipstick, straighened my hair and went downstairs to meet Rosalie, she always knew how to help, shes such a good friend.

We went to a new club that opened about three days ago so it was packed, we skipped the que by batting out eyelids at the bouncer at the door and went inside, inside the furniture was all black and white but the lights on the roof made the room flash light and dark blue, green and red. Me and Rosalie used our fake I.D's , well not that Rosalie needed it being like 50 and all, to buy some Vodka's and Cokes while we sat there for about an hour just chatting and swaying to the music. I was slightly tipsy from the Vodka but it didn't seem to touch Rosalie so when I asked her to dance she denied saying she would rather watch so when 'im a freak' came on my Enrique Inglasias came on I hit the dance floor alone.

As I was getting lost in the music a boy about 19 came to dace with me, as the songs continued to play our dancing turned more into touching and grinding, it was fair to say he was handsome, he had blond hair, blue eyes and a really sexy lip ring which I couldn't take my eyes off, but It tasted even better when we were kissing. He picked me up by my bum and I wrapped my legs around him as he took me to the corner of the club and pushed me against the wall sucking and kissing my neck, he was sensational with his mouth I couldn't hold back my moans, I directed his mouth back to mine and our tounges battled for dominance. He stood me down on the floor and still kissing me started pulling down the zip and the front of my jumpsuit while I ran my hands under his black shirt feeling his faint muscle lines not even caring anymore that we were in the club, because I came here for a disraction and thats what I was going to get. I just started fiddling with the button on his jeans when he was pulled away from me and onto the floor, I looked down at him confused, then looked up frozen still, stood there was the last person I wanted to see, Jacob.

I just looked at him adrenaline still punching through my veins, I clenched my fist turning my knuckles white spat through my teeth

"What the hell are you doing here Jacob"

he seemed angry too "Charlie was worried about you, you cant just come to a club and get smashed because your-"

"SHUT YOUR MOUTH I CAN DO WHAT I LIKE!" I yelled, he had such a cheek, I get no appology for a backhand to the face, he hasn't spoken to me for weeks and now he thinks he can tell me what to do.

I didn't want to listen to him, I just zipped up my jumpsuit and stormed off in search for Rosalie totally forgeting my distraction on the floor. I found her still sat in the same seat at the bar drinking an apple martini only her hands we stiff and her eyes cold,

"Natalie, lets leave, the dogs are here" how did she know, could she see them? smell them? well it doesn't matter she practically read my mind

"I couldn't agree more, lets go" I said and drank the last of her drink wanting to forget about him.


	15. Chapter 15

Stumbling through the car park looking for Rosalie's car, we found it already occupied by Sam and the one Jacob was fighting to protect Bella, I was in to much of a mood to be nice and I knew Rosalie was having a hard time controling herself so I just spat out my words as harshly as possible

"move, now" They did as they were told "Good dogs" I chirped, they both growled while Rosaie beared her fangs.

As I walked towards the car I then understood why they moved without being difficult, Jacob was already in the car, I must have took longer than I thought stumbling in heals from the club.

"For goodness sake, leave me alone Jacob!" I shouted the last part

"Listen I-"

"NO! you Listen, I am fine, im with Rosalie so go home and tell Charlie to stop worrying"

"This bloodsucker has been drinking, she is not taking you home!" He got out of the car slamming the door and walked up to me breathing slowly calming himself down "Listen im sorry, for everything, for hitting you" Rosalie snarled but Jacob didn't bother looking "and for not contacting you" then he smiked slighly "as you know ive had allot on my plate"

He was just making me madder and madder, I started feeling dizzy, probably from the Vodka and me shouting at Jacob didn't help my head "YOU THINK YOUR THE ONLY ONE WITH PROBLEMS JACOB, MY PARENTS ARE DEAD, FOR THE SECOND TIME IN MY LIFE THERE DEAD, AND I COULD EVEN HAVE SOME ILLNESS FROM BLACKING OUT ALL THE TIME, BUT YOU WOULDN'T KNOW THAT BECAUSE YOU WASN'T THERE! SO DONT TALK TO ME ABOUT HAVING ALLOT ON YOUR PLATE"

He just stood there shocked at my outburst, he looked back at sam and the other one then back at me and spoke quietly "what do you mean blackouts?"

"its none of your buisness, now just go"

"I cant go knowing you could blackout anyminute" he looked worried, why?

He just got me mad again and the booze started talking "WHY IM NOT YOUR GIRLFRIEND, YOU DONT CARE ABOUT ME, THE ONLY PERSON YOU CARE ABOUT IS BELLA!"

he looked confused "why-"

But I didn't stop "BUT YOU CANT HAVE HER BECAUSE SHE LOVES SOMEBODY ELSE, I KNOW HOW IT FEELS JACOB, BECAUSE AS STUPID AS I AM I LOVE YOU! AND EVERYONE I LOVE DIES!" I regreted telling him as soon as I did, my headache got worse and I started hyperventalating, Rosalie noticed straight away and caught me before I could hit the floor from blacking out.

Rosalie's POV

I knew the signs of her blacking out so I caught her before she did, the dogs also ran over the help, I just snarled and the two backed away but not Jacob, he was a stuborn little pup. I didn't have time to argue because she wasn't breathing so I needed to get her back to Carlisle, Jacob must have guessed what I was doing because he ran to the car and got in the drivers seat

"You run it will be faster, ill drive her to the treaty line" he turned on the engine

"If your not there, ans theres a scratch on my car, youll be dogs food, got it"

"Got it" then I ran.

I got home in 8 minutes, Alice was allready at the door worried waiting for me

"where is she?" she asked

"the dogs are bringingher to the treaty line, she isnt breathing so get Carlisle and make sure the room is ready"

She nodded and ran back inside while I ran to the line.

Like he said Jacob arrived without a scratch on my car, I didn't thank him as I grabbed Natalie out the back of the car

"leave the car here and go" then I went back.

I took her to Carlisle in the hospital room and put her on the bed, he put an oxygen mask over her mouth like he usually did and waited, but nothing happened, I looked at Carlisle confused

"Whats going on she normally breaths by now"

"I don't know" He started pumping her heart to try and make a difference, I watched as he did it ten times and still nothing, she still wasn't breathing.

No she can't die, shes my only friend outside my family, this cant happen again.

I know Carlisle tried his best but it was no good, he turned to me clearly upset, but I just held up my hand not taking my eyes off her keeping him silent. I have seen many people die, this was nothing new to me, so I just turned around and left showing no emotion, but inside I just lost a true friend.

In the living room they all knew what happened by my non-emotional face, because they have seen it many times. All there faces turned down, upset, while I stayed emotionless.

"How are we going to tell Bella?" I asked

"Ill call Edward to bring her over" Alice whispered.

When Bella came over, Alice took her to one side and told her the news, she just broke down crying, not stopping while Edward sat on the floor with his arms around her, comforting her. When Bella eventually calmed down, she went to see Natalie I knew she would start crying again at the sight of her limp body so I went to my room. It makes no sense to me, if she was ill Carlisle would have known, so for her to just die made no sense, and what happened to her changing, im sure she wasn't suppose to change into a dead body, but I didn't want to think about it, there was no point she was dead and that was that, so I went for a hunt with Emmett.


	16. Chapter 16

Edward's POV

I hate it, I hate seeing Bella in pain, the death of a family member is never easy. I know Carlisle did everything he could but clearly it wasn't enough. I do feel sad for the death of Natalie, she was a good person, and a good cousin to Bella, I just cant believe the suddenness of her death.

Bella was still sniffling by my side "I just" sniff "wish that I" sniff "spent more time with her"

Oh my Bella "Its okay, you didn't know" I said but I knew my words would be no good, you would always feel that regret.

"Edward?" she looked at me with her beautifull teary eyes, I had to control myself not to kiss her tears away,

"Yes my love?"

"can I ask a really big favour, I know it will be hard, but he needs to know" oh I wish I could read her mind so I would know what she was talking about.

"who need to know?"

"Jacob"

my face scruched up "but jacob's a-"

"I know but you just have to stand at the line and call him, im sure he could hear you, and Rosalie said he brought Natalie" she stopped to contol herself "here so he's probably worried"

I sighed "Okay" I stood up and took her hand and walked to the door

"No, can you go, I want to see her"

Rosalie walked out then clearly annoyed, shes so insensitive.

I didn't want to go, I didn't want to leave her but its what she wanted, so I went to the treaty line.

It took about five minutes to get to the border , I took a deep breath and called "Jacob!"

I waited about five minutes and five wolves walked to the line, I greeted them all indervidually

"Sam, Paul, Embry, Quil, Jacob" I nodded

"how is she" Jacob thought

I didn't know how to do it, so I just came out with it "Shes dead"

Sam and Paul bowed there heads and walked back into the forest out of sight, while Embry and Quil howled clearly upset, but Jacob just stood there shocked "How" he thought

"I dont know, Carlisle did everything he could"

"Was it from her blackouts?"

"Maybe"

"Can I see her?"

"No" I said strongly "you can see her when we take her to hospital tomorrow, Carlisle will say exactly what happened but say it happened early hours of the morning, Bella wants time with her first"

"okay" he thought as he bowed his head and slumped off.

Jacob's POV

I ran away from the bloodsucker as fast as I could and turned back to my human form, I sat in the floor in the forest, breaking apart, Imprinting was suppose to be a beautifull thing, your suppose to live happily ever after with the love of your life. I imprinted on Natalie as soon as I saw her at Emilys, her beautiful blue eyes, little row of freakles across her nose and her amazing red plump lips, her long eyelashes made darker by her makeup, her perfect curved body, I was falling in love with her so much I totally forgot she was talking to me until she left, and when she said she loved me in the car park, It was like my heart grew three sizes bigger, I was never happier than I was in that moment even though she was shouting at me. I started to think about marriage, children, a house, because I knew I didn't want to spend my life with anyone else, but all thats gone now she's...she's...I couldn't even bring myself to say the word. I just sat there all night crying myself to sleep thinking about the love of my life, and what could have been.


	17. Chapter 17

I woke up like I normally did when I blacked out, in Carlisle's hospital room only I didn't have a headache or a hangover, I actually felt normal. I took a white sheet off me and walked into the living room, everyone was there, but they looked really sad, Bella was crying a little, and nobody was talking, the only noise in the room was from the T.V.

"Why the sad faces guys" I chirped trying to lighten the mood.

But everyone just looked up like they had seen a ghost, probably because I looked terrible like I usually did when I blecked out, then Carlisle got up slowely and touched my shoulder staring intensly at me.

"Impossible" he said sounding facinated, maybe I didn't look that bad?

Bella then ran up to me and practically jumped me crying,

"whats going on guys?" I asked confused, why was bella crying?

Carlisle slightly frowns "Natalie, you were dead" dead?

I burst into laughter letting go of a shocked Bella "how could I be dead if im stood right here" I chuckle "you crazy lot" I hope they were joking

Carlisle just looks at me serious "Whats the last thing you remember?"

"I went clubbing with Rosalie, I was screaming at Jacob then I blacked out" I leaved out the part about my parents, not wanting to think about it.

"Natalie when you blacked out, your heart stopped and I confirmed you dead, you have been on that bed for 16 hours"

what? "stop messing guys this isnt funny now, your scaring me" I started to shake.

"Natalie were not lying" sniffles Bella "I thought I lost you" she gives me a weak smile.

"So your telling me I was dead for 16 hours" I couldn't stop shaking, get a grip Natalie! god I was being such an idiot

"Yes" says Rosalie with no emotion, I might aswell have said 'was it raining yesterday?'

"okay then, well now im alive im going to go for a walk" I said.

I looked at everyone then started walking out, I walked straight to the edge of the forest, but I could feel everyones eyes on me so I turned around, but they weren't looking at me they were looking at the floor. I looked down and was confused, there was a long trail of plants and flowers from the bottem step, along the drive and ended under my feet, im sure that wasn't there just now.

"Natalie circle back" said Edward breathless.

So I did as he said and walked back around to the steps and plants were sprouting in my footsteps, it was so beautifull, and strange. I stopped shaking and for some reason I started giggling and running around looking at the green pattern under my feet, all the others were still shocked, but I didn't care I just ran off into the forest like a little girl.

I got deep into the forest still running, everything was brighter and standout, like my eyes changed, the leaves were the colour of emeralds, the bluebells like saphires, it was like paradise. But strange things were happening that I couldn't explain, the branches overhanged and made a arch for me to walk through by the wave of my hand and the flick of the wrist, all the animals came to walk with me, the birds swooped low to fly through the trees with me like they were my followers, it was like I could control nature, and the further I got into the forest the stronger this control became, I didn't care how strange the control was, It was amazing in a way nobody could understand.

I got so out of breath I started slowely walking admiring the beauty of the forest, I kept walking like that magnetic pull was back, making me twist and turn through the trees until I found someone lying naked on there front, I got closer and gasped feeling a shooting pain in my back, I got closer trying to ignore the pain but it started to become unbearable and I fell to the floor and started screaming, wakeing up the naked figure, and with my stupid luck, it was Jacob, again, but what was Jacob doing in the middle of the forest naked? and why did I have a magnetic pull towards him?. He stood up and I couldn't look away from his naked figure, he was utterly beautifull, my face when bright red and he realised he was naked and threw on some trousers he had tied around his ankle, weird, but I was soon brought back to the pain in my back screaming again, Jacob looked shocked, confused and scared but he ran over to me kneeling down.

"NATALIE WHATS WRONG!" he shouted over my screams, but I pushed him away, I didn't want him anywhere near me.

Just when I thought the pain couldn't get any worse I felt a ripping under my shoulder blades ripping my blue jumpsuit from the club, it was like a blunt knife being stretched across my skin, or a saw cutting away at the bone, it was horrible.

"NATALIE YOUR BACK!" I felt around under my shoulder blades and felt giant hooks coming out

"WHAT THE HELL!?" Then I screamed in pain again louder.

Jacob didn't know what to do, he was just looking at me moving his hands not knowing were to put them to help.

For some reason it felt like I was trying to push out the hooks from my back like trying to push out a baby, then like the baby was out, the pain suddenly sort of popped then stopped, and I felt so relieved, breathing heavily, sweating.

I looked around and Jacob was on his back like he had been pushed away from me, I stood up and then tried to put my hands behind my back, but there were blocked by something soft, I moved my hands around and they felt like feathers? I turned around expecting to see a bird, but nothing was there. I felt a bone under my shoulder blades move slightly and then these big giant brown feathered wings circled around my body. Did I have wings? I could actually fell myself touching them, my wings reacting to my touch, I just looked at jacob still on the floor and flapped my wings, it was as easy as lifting my arm, like instinct. I bent my knees and pushed off the ground and flew into the air like a rocket, I was actually flying, it was like a dream. I flew over the forest and looked at it from above, and it was more beautifull than walking through it, up above it was like a collage of greens, light, dark, only more beautiful. The sun was spectacular, I could actually feel the heat on my face and the wind move my feathers, I reached my hand up and it was actually like touching the clouds.

I looked down and saw the Cullens house, white against the green and swooped down landing on the steps making no noise as my feet touched the ground.


End file.
